Why the Y Chromosome is over rated.

Yes, I understand that this post is a little contradictory seeing as I am a girl, but sometimes girls/females in general are over-rated and stupid. I hate the pettiness that seems to abound in the girl-world, where it not only flourishes, but is almost encouraged. This is stupid. I refuse to join in this nonsense and am really rather sick of it.

This rant kind of stems from two places, work and so called "friends". The work drama I can deal with (not that I really have a choice) because I can sit in my little office at my computer and, ignore the rest of the world. As long as I keep to my self, the drama doesn't really get to me, it makes the office kind of tense at times, but all in all…survivable.

The most recent and pressing reason that I am in my hater mode are so called "friends" (here after referred to as "The Stupid-heads") The Stupid-heads are turning out to be the model of all that is loathed in the Girl World, and I am done. I quit. I refuse to play their game and gossiped about. So here it is,

Dear Stupid Heads,

I give up. I don't want it any more. If this is what wanting it leads to, then have it. It is all yours. Thank you.

Sincerely, Me.

South of the Boarder and Back

Some friends and I decided recently to go on a Cruise to Cabo. But this was not any cruise, it was an LDS Singles Cruise. (Yes... I am for real. Also slight disclaimer, I understand that my value as a human might have gone down because of my attendance, but let it be noted that this was not my idea.)

We met at a friends house Friday (April 9th) at 6ish and headed to San Diego, stoping for a quick In-n-Out break around Baker. We made it to San Diego around 11, and made our way to the Temple (with some slight backtracking) for a break. Sitting in the parking lot, we found a cheep hotel that would let 13 people crash for a few hours. Once we made it to our Days Inn (those poor people) we found our room and preceded to cram all of us onto two queen sized beds, a fold out couch and what ever floor space could be found. (the pillow talk that night was very interesting especially in our bed where Mike, me, Jon and Diana were all spooning in order to fit on this little bed…no, we did not stay that way for long)

Saterday morning we got up, got ready (also an interring experience sharing a small sink and mirror with all of those people) and started carpooling people to the Dock. (not fun) After finally getting everyone there with all of their stuff we got on the boat and settled in. Dinner was at 6 which is where I discovered that I was sitting at a table full of UMo's. (The seating arrangements at dinner had been shuffled around so that we could "meet more people"… oh the joys.)

A quick side note about UMo's (there were plenty on our boat): A UMo is a Utah Mormon who is not only a Mormon who resides in Utah but also has the certain "Molly/Peter" quality about them, to the point of being laughable. (This in no way applies to Utah Mormons who are normal, socially acceptable humans.) This over abundance of UMo's lead to one of my favorite people watching games while sunbathing…"Spot the UMo"

Needless to say, my Dinner time dining experience for the rest of the trip was… interesting. After dinner we headed to one of the lounges to partake in one of the ageless quintessential mormon activities… Karaoke. (this became a nightly activity after dinner as there wasn't really anything to do until later and getting drunk is not really an option.) After learning how good and awful some of our fellow boat mates were, we stuck around for a Comedy show that none of us realized was "Adult". Luckily, the only thing adult about it was occasional swearing. (I heard worse in the halls of High School) At one point the comedian was making fun of the Holy Land wars and said that they (the black community) had come up with the phrase Shi'ite long before the disagreements over who bombed who first started…

Person 1 "How's your shawty?"

Person 2 "Shi'ite"

Around midnight we headed to the Upper Deck to get cones of Soft-serve ice cream (another nightly occurrence) and then to Dancing at the "Night Club" on board for some dancing.

Sunday was what they called a "Fun day on Ship" I called it a day for sleeping in the sun. Lots of sleeping, lots of sun… all of it good. (with a small break to learn some country line dances that we already knew, which was surprisingly difficult on a rocking ship) That night was the "Formal Night" which turned out to be kind of like a prom for big kids. (some people came in floor length gowns and tuxes…wow) That was followed by more ice-cream and dancing.

Early Monday morning we pulled in the the bay at Cabo and got off the Ship. (we had to be taxied off of the boat because the bay was too shallow for our boat) After meeting up with friends we went snorkeling at Lovers Beach, then repelling/Zip-line fun further inland. (lots of fun)

Random Side-note #2 - Biting. On the beach one of my new friends Travis walked past me and bit me on the shoulder. Yes… bit, with his teeth. (I just got out of the ocean so I probably tasted salty, but I didn't want to ask) Having just met them through a friend the day before, I was a little unprepared for the "common" occurrence of getting bit while hanging out with Travis and Aaron. After a few times I kind of got use to this not completely unenjoyable experience. The biting continued though the week.

After we made it back to the boat and had dinner and our usually Karaoke/Ice-cream fix) we went to a Hypnotist show which was one of the funniest things I have ever witnessed. Our good friend Melissa Earl "Missy" was amazing to watch, she was so funny I had a hard time breathing.

Tuesday we went to shore and walked around a bunch of little shops most of which sold "authentic mexican______" made in China. We found a restaurant called "The Office" right on the beach for lunch. (I wish that was my office for real) Then I stayed on the beach for some amazing people watching while everyone finished their shopping, then we made our way back to the boat. That night was the "Adult" version of the Hypnotist show which was much more scandalous than the comedy show. I am pretty sure I blushed through most of it.

Wednesday was another day on the boat we slept a lot then spent some serious time in the Hot Tub (I have never been that pruney!) Then the usual Dinner/Karaoke/Ice-cream mixup and Dancing till all hours of the Morning.

Thursday we got off the boat walked through "customs" (which was a joke) and drove home.

Pictures and other random side notes will follow.

Please?

Dear Days of the Week gods,

Can it please be Friday today? Please? I feel like I have had a week of Mondays and after all of this, it would be much appreciated if we could just skip to the weekend. I am Done. Please. Thank you.

Love, Alisha

What I love about The South…

THURSDAY - March 4th

• Las Vegas to New Orleans
• Watched a crazy lady at the Las Vegas Airport
• Ate Dinner at Oceana (soon to be on the Food Network)
• Wandered around Burbon Street

FRIDAY - March 5th

• Went to the 9th District - Huricane Katrina and Tom Cruse's "Make It Right" (crazy early so we wouldn't get kidnapped… really bad part of town)
• Bignets (fried scone-like goodness) at Cafe DuMonet
• Wandered Around the French Quarter - Lots o' Shopping
• Lunch at New Orleans Hard Rock Cafe
• Nottaway Plantation
• Drove to Baton Rouge
• Amazing People Watching at Wal-Mart and Applebees

SATURDAY - March 6th

• Houmas House (My Favorite Plantation)
• LSU Basket Ball game (Pathetic)
• Aligator and Crawfish at Chimes
• Dancing at Boutin's
• Cheese Cake

SUNDAY - March 7th

• Baton Rouge Singles Ward (Amazing)
• Lunch at Whataburger (gives In-n-Out a run for their money)
• Oak Alley Plantation
• Drive to New Orleans
• Fly Home

Random side-note about the picture below...yes, I know I am wearing Leggings, but I was not going to the Airport in just a sundress. Sorry my Dear Sweets.

Here are a few random tidbits from my 4ish days in Louisiana.

The Best People Watching Ever.

I got my first taste of Southern Amazingness at the Airport before I even left Las Vegas. I was sitting in the airport and this lady in a LOT of Bling sat down a few chairs down from me and proceeded to have a full blown conversation with the rat-dog that she had in a bag on her lap. She had such a deep accent that I could hardly understand her. (Not that I was eavesdropping and if I was I am not sorry.) But I was just so amazed that she was talking to the DOG on her LAP.

Then, Pauli and I went to dinner on Friday night and witness a superb display of Southern White Trash. There was a table of women, it must have been a "Sisters" night because they were all related and the "Mom" was one of my favorite to watch. But they were talking about not driving drunk, but "Sipping and Swerving", and how one of the ladies needed a new frier and how the "Piggly Wiggly" (a grocery store) had started carrying Wine. Oh wow.

The next morning we went to the "Waffle House" and when Pauli asked what I was having I told her I was thinking about having a normal waffle with Blue Berries, she laughed at me and said that the only fruit in the entire restaurant was the orange juice that came out of a dispenser. Its a breakfast place, shouldn't they have fruit?

Amazing Houses

This trip has solidified my desire to have a wrap-around porch when I (finally) grow up and get my own house. During our long hours in the car, we found some of the most amazing houses that would almost (note the ALMOST) make it worth living down there.

Holy Humidity

The humidity made my hair go crazy curly and kinda resembled a clown wig, but because it was so curly, it only took a few minuets to do. (which is a huge plus because when it comes to getting ready I am kinda lazy) And humidity = rain… which I love.

Hot and Spicy but Dang Good

The food was one of the things that I was most interested in trying while I was down there. We ate…

• Blackened Shrimp pasta (so hot my nose ran and eyes watered)
• Bignets - Fried Scone like things with enough powdered sugar to ski in
• Fried Aligator - I kinda liked it
• Hush Puppies - Fried Corn Bread…interesting
• Shrimp and Corn Chowder - There is some form of Seafood in everything
• Wataburger - Pauli had told me of its goodness and she was right

A Joyful bit of Random

So, in accordance with one of my New Years Resolutions, (one of many) I am trying to Blog every week…we will see how it goes around April, when the gym finally empties. But the problem with this is, that I am having a hard time coming up with anything even semi-worth reading this week. All I have got is a few random side notes to life. Sorry.

First, I got my graduation pictures back, yes I did graduate almost a year ago. But I really like them (which is unusual..normally I HATE taking pictures) I will post some up later.

Next, I have decided that I really like Vegas "Winters". An average of 60 degrees in February is fine with me. I like visiting and playing in the snow, but after 5 years, I have decided that I don't ever want to live in it again.

Third, (My Dear Sweet Ashley this one is your fault) I like painting my fingernails fun colors. Before Ashley I liked nude colors and clear on my fingers, funky colors were for my toes were they were hidden. But now, I change them at least once a week and the colors range from gold to "I'm not really a waitress" red to "Sapphire Snow" blue and almost everything in-between. (I say almost because I have yet to paint my finger nails pink) And I mostly like OPI because of the Amazing names that they call their colors.

Oh I wish I was a Spy

I was meandering through Barnes and Noble the other day, when I cam across a book titled, "If I told you l loved you, I would have to kill you". Needless to say, I was intrigued and bought the book. It tells the story about a girl at a prestigious boarding school for "gifted" students which is a cover for a spy school. Told with a very personable voice, the book was a joy to inhale.

I have always been a fan of spy stories, but never wanted to BE one of the characters mainly because the stories were about the killing/assassin sort of spy. This book however is more about the sneaking sort of spy, which I defiantly want to be. So, after finishing the book in 2 days, I found the second and third books and am defiantly enjoying them. Being a sneaking sort of spy some days sounds much more enjoyable than being an editor (even though I really do like my job). It makes me want to write my emails in code, and wear a watch that really isn't a watch but something much cooler, like a holographic Oxford English Dictionary that is always current.

Organized is not OCD

I was talking to a friend last night who very kindly informed me that I am OCD. I told her I thought she was exaggerating "Just a bit". She said acceptance is the first step to recovery. Right. So I was thinking about this as I was on my way to work this morning (I have a longish sort of drive which leaves a lot of time for thinking) and she might have a point. Not that I think I am in any way OCD, but I have "perfectionist tendencies" that might not be normal to most.

-I have to make my bed in the morning because I don't like going to sleep in a messy bed. If I forget or run out of time in the morning I make it at night before I slip in.

-My closet is organized according to article of clothing, then color, then "length"

-Movies are alphabetized according to Title then Release Date

-Books are alphabetized by Author then Publication Date

-I don't like writing in pen because I can't erase mistakes

-I hate floating files on my computer

In my opinion, none of this points to OCD. I just like being organized.

Powder and Madness.

Ok… So my lack of a post is being blamed on my CRAZY work schedule. We had all of magazines go to press in the same week (this only happens 2x a year thankfully!) and so the past two weeks have been kind of hectic. I didn't do a lot except work and sleep (a little) and dancing on thursdays (required stress relief). So there hasn't been much to share… I even had to work through a Rebel game. No good.

Although the weekend before the madness started, I got to go to Snowbird with my Dad, Hailee and Spencer, which made me crazy happy. After a week of rain in Vegas, and a week of snow in Utah, the powder was Amazing. And to make a great weekend complete, I got to have dinner with my Dear Sweet Ashley as well as Josh, Lanni and Jessica… some of the people that I have missed the most since leaving Provo. It made the whole weekend Perfect.